3 Best Self Improvement Books To Read Now
"Show me a family of readers, and I will show you the people who move the world." – Napoleon Bonaparte
SELF-IMPROVEMENT
The books:
How To Win Friends and Influence People — Dale Carnegie
The Magic Of Thinking Big — David J. Schwartz
Influence: The Psychology Of Persuasion — Robert Cialdini
If you want to learn about what people want, how to communicate effortlessly, how to find the motivation to pursue your goals, and the underlying factors behind your decisions, read on. These books will help. They are fundamentals in terms of self-help. You will run into these time and time again.
Carnegie’s book deserves it’s legendary reputation. The book is priceless when it comes to learning how to communicate. A no-fluff set of takeaways:
(1) don’t criticize, condemn, or complain;
(2) give honest and sincere appreciation;
(3) arouse in other people an eager want;
(4) become genuinely interested in other people;
(5) make the other person feel important;
(6) encourage others to speak about themselves;
(7) if you are wrong, admit it quickly and emphatically;
(8) try honestly to see things from the other person’s point of view;
(9) praise the slightest improvement and praise every improvement;
(10) make the fault seem easy to correct.
Schwartz’ book is all about ridding yourself of excuses in the path to success. You don’t have to be incredibly intelligent or unique, you just need a fitting attitude. This isn’t the first self-improvement book I bought, but the first one I finished. That says a lot about the nature of this book. A few take home messages:
(1) think success, not failure “I’ll win” not “I’m outclassed”;
(2) remind yourself that you are better than you think you are;
(3) believe big, little goals mean little achievements;
(4) be grateful for your good health and don’t worry yourself into a hospital bed (health excuse);
(5) remind yourself that the ability to think outweighs the ability to memorize facts (intelligence excuse);
(6) use your age to your advantage—a fifty-year old still has 40 percent of their productive years ahead of them (age excuse);
(7) action cures fear;
(8) practice confidence—be a front-seater, make eye contact, walk faster, speak up.
Cialdini’s book is an invaluable introduction to behavioral psychology. It will change the way you think if you have no experience with the psychology behind people’s actions. You’ll learn crucial principles and how to use them to persuade—and how to defend yourself against them. Takeaways to leave you salivating:
(1) the principle of reciprocity, or why we seek to repay what another has provided for us—we feel indebted for things like free samples and deeds;
(2) the principle of consistency, or why we desire to appear consistent with what we have already done—we encounter psychological pressure to stay committed to things like religious affiliation and marriage;
(3) social proof, which is what a lot of us refer to as peer pressure—revealing why we order a margarita when our friends do, and why we laugh when our buddies do even if we don’t get the joke.
Of course, these books have way more to offer. The point is that you get a brief introduction to each title. A notable point from Carnegie: “The only way on Earth to influence other people is to talk about what they want and show them how to get it.” and “If there is any secret to success, it lies in the ability to get the other person’s point of view and see things from that person’s angle as well as from your own.” A thought-provoking line from Schwartz: “Knowledge is only potential power. Knowledge is power only when put to use—and then only when the use made of it is constructive.” and “There’s an old saying worth repeating often: “I felt sorry for myself because I had ragged shoes until I met a man with no feet.”” A brain scratcher from Cialdini: “Often we don’t realize that our attitude toward something has been influenced by the number of times we have been exposed to it in the past.” and “we all fool ourselves from time to time in order to keep our thoughts and beliefs consistent with what we have already done or decided”.
My hopes are that these takeaways are powerful enough for you to pick one of the books for your next read. Enjoy.